La Soledad, espejo, camino y refugio

La soledad: espejo, camino, refugio La soledad no es enemiga. No hay que temerle. Está en todas partes: cuando termina una relación, cuando muere alguien, cuando elegimos vivir solos, o cuando simplemente sentimos que nadie nos ve de verdad. Puede doler, sí. Pero también puede sanar. La soledad puede volverse un espacio de libertad y de escucha interior. En silencio, sin distracciones, algo empieza a revelarse: lo que somos, lo que hemos evitado sentir, lo que necesitamos. No hay que romantizarla ni demonizarla. Hay una soledad elegida, que nos da paz y claridad. Y hay una soledad impuesta, que pesa, que duele, que a veces se siente como abandono. Pero ambas hablan de nosotros. La sociedad nos empuja a estar acompañados, a tener pareja, a llenar el calendario de salidas y eventos. Pero la verdad es que estar rodeados no siempre significa estar conectados. A veces, es más solitaria la compañía forzada que la cama vacía. Ahora bien, la solución no es encerrarse para siempre ni asumir que no necesitamos a nadie. Somos seres sociales. Nuestro cuerpo y nuestra mente necesitan contacto: un abrazo, una conversación con alguien que te entienda de verdad, alguien con quien puedas reírte de las mismas tonterías y hablar de lo que duele sin miedo. Relacionarnos con otros nos ayuda a vernos. Nos espejan, nos hacen preguntas que solos no se nos ocurren. La vida se enriquece cuando encontramos personas con quienes compartir el pan, el silencio, las preguntas existenciales y los momentos absurdos. El punto no es tener compañía por tenerla, sino rodearse de personas que nos reflejen, que nos reten, que se alegren por nuestro brillo sin intentar apagarlo. La soledad no es el problema. El problema es pensar que tenemos que elegir entre estar solos o acompañados. No es así. Podemos cultivar espacios de soledad fértil y, al mismo tiempo, nutrir vínculos reales, con presencia, con ternura, con piel. Estar solo no significa estar aislado. Aislarse emocionalmente, desconectarse del cuerpo y del otro, eso sí enferma. Pero saber estar con uno mismo y buscar relaciones con sentido, eso da fuerza. Nos ordena. Nos centra. En el fondo, lo que buscamos no es simplemente compañía, sino conexión. Que alguien nos mire y diga: "Yo también siento eso". Y entonces, la soledad se transforma.

Any comment on this one??? "Take the experience of the beautiful butcher's wife. She loves caviar, but she doesn't want any. That's why she desires it. You see, the object of desire is the cause of the desire, and this object that is the cause of desire is the object of the drive—that is to say, the object around which the drive turns. Since I am here in a dialogue with someone who has worked on my texts, I may express myself in some rather concentrated formulae. It is not that desire clings to the object of the drive—desire moves around it, in so far as it is agitated in the drive. But all desire is not necessarily agitated in the drive. There are empty desires or mad desires that are based on nothing more than the fact that the thing in question has been forbidden you. By virtue of the very fact that it has been forbidden you, you cannot do otherwise, for a time, than think about it. That, too, is desire. But whenever you are dealing with a good object, we designate it —it's a question of terminology, but a justified terminology —as an object of love. Next time, I will this by articulating the relation between love, the transference and desire." Jacques Lacan, June 1964

Dear Skeptic of Psychoanalysis

Psychoanalysis is not science, I agree. Is a method, and not scientific...Thank God. By the way is not a method that is needed to find lost memories, at the end of the encounter with yourself, you don't mind if you have lost few of those memories, and the one who determine if the memories are false...is the individual himself!! Could science point out a true memory? Base in what? ...even nanotechnology research in psycho neurological findings, shows memories readings can change in seconds if you introduce a doubt in the subject of study!!... Men false or true memory is scientifically impossible...yet to prove. I find your categorization and statements of Psychoanalysis very subjective and unscientific itself. The correspondence between Einstein and Freud would help you better to be less bitter towards Psychoanalysis and get a more gentle approach. Very interesting stuff. Follow the discussion at skeptic.com

Just being

A relaxed weekend.

The Hummingbird's Eye: Personal Change, a New Revolution.

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Personal Change, a New Revolution.

Some times we spend a lot of energy picking fights in the world or even wars, internal and personal and together as a community, Castaneda said that in Latin America intellectuals were always talking about political and social revolution and where a lot of bombs were thrown.

Revolution haven't change much, It takes little daring to bomb a building, but in order to give up cigarettes or to stop being anxious or to stop internal chattering, you have to remake yourself. We need to focus in our internal revolution, we need to observe ourselves.


This is where real reform begins. One time at Earth Week, some man was lecturing on ecology and the evils of war in Vietnam. All the while he was smoking. Don Juan said, "I cannot imagine that he is concerned with other people's bodies when he doesn't like his own." Our first concern should be with ourselves.


I can like my fellow men only when I am at my peak of vigor and am not depressed. To be in this condition I must keep my body trimmed. Any revolution must begin here in this body. I can alter my culture but only from within a body that is impeccably tuned-in to this weird world.



I can only wish institutions, social workers, service providers, and of course people in general could understand this in the every day work.